baking bread today

Last night in Mass this handsome young deacon talked about the waiting for Christmas, about all his childish anticipation, and it was really very sweet.

I'm baking bread today, big fluffy loaves, one wheat for my mother and rich cheese & jalapeno filled loaf for my father. I love to bake, and I simply don't get enough chances to do so. It feels good today, with the grey sky outside my porch, and the music turned up loud.

My dreams were long and weird, stretching on over days it felt. Running from people in coats, the cameras up on the walls of the UTC building, playing games in the hallway of the linguistics department and being chased off. Hana had a new office, now in charge of everything. A landslide buried the apartments beneath me, and I walked on the sandy shifting soil to pick up a box of strawberries and shrimp on skewers.

If you could see me now... ansat I hope you are okay out there. Sleeping. Write me and tell me if you are going to use that livejournal you signed up for. Thanks for the radish card, it made me smile.

the words in our hands

Last night I worked more on my story, sketching in a good chunk of the early parts. I think it is roughly ten thousand words now. Enough to be a decent short story I suppose. My friends want me to expand it, but that wasn't my original goal, so... I don't know. I wanted an excuse to write without having to worry about who was going to read and what kind of grade it means. Just writing for myself, only myself.

Drown was fantastic last night while I sat in Metro, it is such joy to read. Thank you Kore. I just keep reading it again and again.

My body aches a little, and I think I will stretch myself out, perhaps run around the complex for a little while. Feel the sharp tinge to the air, Christmas anticipation, the smell of fires, and cold.

you can say it one more time

Vampires are sexy. Sex and death, sex and death, you see. They agree with me. Professor L. and I talked about Innocent Blood and The Hunger the other night. I forgot to ask about Russian vampire movies, maybe I can email Professor G. about it.

While I ran, Depeche Mode played on my headphones, and I just wanted to laugh so hard and sing at the top of my lungs. The radio fairies smiled on me today, so I could glide over the pavement like a ghost in the grey breathing in and out to the sound my feet up legs stretched out... it feels good, I just don't know how to explain. Like desire and satisfaction all at once.

Merry Christmas

In a few minutes, I'm leaving for the midnight Mass at St Thomas More. My first year for this.. I hugged Father Elmer last night and thanked him.

"I have never been so happy," I said.

Merry Christmas everyone, Merry Christmas.