sickness

I loathe being sick. Hate it. I woke up at 4am, and just felt wretched. I seriously even considered calling my parents or the hospital at one point... my throat and tonsils were swollen, the pressure in my head was unbearable. I had trouble breathing, swallowing, standing up. I stumbled into the bathroom and managed to light a couple candles. Then I spent the better part of an hour using up all the hot water first for a bath, then for a shower. I managed to choke down two tylenol, even though the sensation induces flashback. (I can't take pills anymore) All the heat and steam helped clear my throat a bit, and I staggered back into bed, shaking and sickly.

When I woke up, somehow, the swollen throat and tonsils had diminished. I feel better now, though my head still feels fragile. Wish I wearing a neck brace or something to support my poor neck and skull. It's like I've compressed all the agony of a major illness into a twenty four hour period. I don't ever want to do this again.

But I managed to eat some lunch, take a nap and make it up to the office. Where I'm doing inventory and talking to the remote team. Oh the fun. Well. Could be worse I guess. I just want to go home and lay down on the couch, stare blankly at the television and rest.

The Pope's Elephant by Silvio Bedini

"The menagerie assembled by Leo X was no makeshift housing of birds and beasts haphazardly collected. It was in fact one of the most advanced and professional installations in Europe at that time."
-page 82

"Soon after Leo X was installed at the Vatican, he brought together there a small menagerie oh his own, paticularly featuring lions, and including leopards, monkeys, civit cats and bears... In addition to these beasts, an area of the pope's menagerie situated on the plantation along the slop of the Vatican hill adjacent to the Cortile del Belvedere contained spottedleopaards, panthers, apes and parrots he had recieved as state gifts, as well as several lions sent as gifts reflecting his pontificial name. A contemporary account mentioned 'a multitude of parrots, of diverse colouring... a quantity of monkeys, of apes, of civets and of other bizarre animals...'"
-page 83 to 84

almost out of here

I am not coming in to work tomorrow. They can just live without me and I'll miss a few hours of boredom. My fever makes me shiver, even under a shirt, a sweater, a jacket, a blanket and a fuzzy Russian hat.

Not that I should complain, I'm not seriously ill like Ashley. I can't even imagine going through that. You hang in there, okay?

Work has just been so long. I was laying on the floor by my desk for awhile when I realized I had fallen asleep. Sure enough, I managed to kick the desk and knock stuff over, and the remote team was messaging me incessantly.

Keep drinking juice, wishing I was home in a hot shower or stretched out on the couch. I want to go home and make some of my Irish tea. Being sick just makes me want to claw at myself, rip out whatever is inside me that is causing this feeling. Instead I just kick my feet at the desk and fret, writing boring journal entries over and over, erasing them, wondering what to say. The words are jumbled up in my aching ears.