(no subject)

Listening to the Cure at nine in the morning only makes you want to cry. No reason, no reason at all.

Life is too short to dwell on the things that you can't change, Gemini. Which is exactly what I have been thinking about lately. About how yo ucan't change people, can't break years built in or force them to grow up fast enough to suit yourself. The evil part of me would like nothing more than to reshape everyone according to my own needs. I think I've just become jealous of the ease others have with their lives and their problems.

I'm the only person in the circle who has worked full time non stop. MOst of my friends are lucky enough to only have to do 20 or 25 hours a week. I've never resented that fact until now. Until I'm faced with only a few months left here, so many goodbyes to make, and a hell of a lot of time wasted earning money.

I shouldn't begrudge them their freedom. I shouldn't be irritated, I know how irrational and petty the feeling is. I just feel alone, and not of either world.

Stop dwelling, stop dwelling and either quit your damn job or do something else. Right. At what point does talking to yourself become insanity?

Oh I want to change it all

up in that sky

And when you need it, you can always count on Robert and the live version of "Doing the Unstuck" to make you get up and go. I'm going to listen to this song in July 23rd.

It's never to late to get up and
Kick out the gloom
Kick out the blues
Tear out the pages with all the bad news

It's a perfect day to throw back your head and kiss it all goodbye

(no subject)

A few hours of the sun on my back, talking on the porch with Melynda and Sam, and finishing up Death and the Penguin has restored my mood. We're all making plans, and doing laundry and being such college age kids. Scary to think that we're old enough to all graduate this year.

But you know, it's good to be in love and not to care, and good to feel the sun.