in recovery

I slept alright, waking up only once to swallow more darvocet. The numbness and tingling is gone, so now there is only a dull ache. I probably could have gone to work, but I would have been utterly miserable.

At home, I can lounge around and drink the smoothies Alan makes for me. The smell of the omelet cooking is driving me insane, but I don't think I can really chew yet. I attempted a small bite of omelett, and that was a mistake. Ouch.

On the bright side, all the medication I'm taking for my jaw has made my cramps nonexistant. Sweet.

Thank God and all the powers that be for my husband. He's taken such good care of me and been so helpful in trying to keep me calm and getting me through this. It can't be fun exactly to be married to such a phobic person.

Funny story from yesterday. I had a blood pressure cuff and a heart monitor on my left arm in the chair at the dentist office. I was looking at Alan on my left and talking to him, trying to distract myself from the surgeon and his assistant looking for a vein for the IV sedation. They had trouble getting one in my arm, and I suppose I tensed more than I realized. The blood pressure cuff popped right off my arm. Sigh. Sometimes I wish I was less neurotic about stuff like this. Thank my lucky stars the surgeon was a nice man and found it funny.

taking flight

Since the dental work only set me back $300, I had the money to go ahead and buy that plane ticket. I'll be flying to Phoenix and then to Newark, which makes no sense to me but then airlines never do. I'll be flying out on the 25th of June, and the movers are expected hopefully on that Saturday. Cate tells me it will take about three days of trundling across the country. I've never driven that far before. I am going to try and take a week solid off work, so I have some time on the return side to help Cate unpack a little and settle back into the house. I wonder if she wants her rug back...

I want a cigarette like you wouldn't believe. Ergh. I think it's more from knowing I can't have one than an actual craving for the nicotine. Maybe if I just hold one in my hand that will help.

(no subject)

I never realized how much I clench my jaw with this ever present sort of tension until it became painful. Right now it's keeping me from sleep, so I packed my cheeks with gauze to chew and an ice pack is keeping me company. Alan fell asleep very early tonight.

Once upon a time I knew a Micheal, two Matts and a Jennifer. I dated Michael, and Jennifer dated Matt #1 for a long time. Somewhere in the intervening years, she broke up with him and married Matt #2. I read tonight about their impending divorce, and it's a strange thing to think about all these people I haven't seen in so long.

I probably need to take some more drugs and go to sleep.