my lesson I had to learn

I've begun a half dozen journal entries and deleted them this week. For various reasons, but mostly because the writing was poor and pretentious. One doesn't want to hear a nearly twenty seven year old talk about how old she feels, or the strange peak she stands on now. At worst it comes off as condescending or worthy of eye rolling. I also try to keep discussion of my more private life on a tighter leash because it is either vexing or just entirely too much information.

Work yesterday was one long slog through hell. There were two seperate cases of poisoning, a ten month old baby and a one year old. The mother of the little baby poisoned the kid deliberately with twice the toxic level of Dilantin. Now I hear stories of broken bones and bruises and burns all the time. But I wanted to throw up after this one, it was such a bad scene all around.

What do you tell your kid, when he grows up? Do you tell him that his biological mother tried to kill him? Do you never bring her up again and make sure that your fiancee adopts him? I've been thinking about this since yesteday.

Thank my lucky stars for Mike, who brought dinner and made me a drink. He didn't even hassle me when I starting falling asleep in the middle of Babylon 5. I drove home late, and watched the reflection of the city lights make half the sky grey white behind the hills. I also fell asleep quickly for the first time all week, and slept straight through til morning.

Today is a little better.

(no subject)

Last night was my first genuine night of sleep for the week. Despite that eight hours, I've spent much of today feeling so physically exhausted that the effort required to stay upright in a chair seemed like a bit much. Thankfully it is Friday, and I'm working three normal weeks while I train the newbies in the dark arts of delicate questions and controlling intoxicated reporters. one of the girls had a caller making a crack deal and then smoking crack while on the phone making a child abuse report. Come on, peoples! Wait til you're off the phone before making your crack deal. Because now I have your crack deal on a recorded line! Bwahaha.

This week of grey skies has to be worth it. The wildflowers are everywhere, and the trees have fresh green leaves. Oh I love spring here. Sometimes Texas is so beautiful I could cry.

I feel sort of at loose ends. There are many things to do, like acquiring a yoga mat, that I need to do. I want to see 300 again on the big screen. But the thought of getting out and about seems tiring. Maybe I should read all evening, take a long bath and sleep more in hopes the ache in my hip joints and my arms will disappear and I'll be more energetic.