days blur

I knew I depended on my routines but I didn't know how disorienting it would be to take them away. I didn't drive anywhere for four days, which is an awfully long for a person in the suburbs who needs a car. Everything's screwy - my workout habits, my eating habits, my daily life in the house. We are lucky that Mike is employed and able to keep his job from home without much hardship and I don't want to make light of that. But god, I find myself going crazy that I am never alone. I need my alone time to be an ugly mess. Otherwise I just store up all this tension until it feels like I am going to explode. I am alone when I take a walk around the neighborhood but it is not the same. 

I miss going out to lunch. I miss ordinary grocery shopping. I miss the gym and the movie theater.