three (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
threeplusfire) wrote2002-02-11 08:04 am
threeplusfire) wrote2002-02-11 08:04 am
will I ever learn to sleep
Even after it quieted down, sleep proved elusive. I think it is my lungs. Finally I piled my pillows up and drifted off almost sitting up.Too much dreaming of death.
I started my Lenten fast more than a week early this year. But I think I will give up smoking entirely anyways. I have no physical desire for it, and evaluating the psychological aspects does not leave me with much either. I started smoking because it was the most socially acceptable form of self punishment I had at eighteen. I continued because it was something to do, something to share and a way into conversations I didn't know how to start. I think I've grown past that now.
The only thing I do miss is having something to do with my hands. I fidget too much.
Instead of going to school, I want to lay here with my white tiger that I've finally named Dmitri. Should have gone with my first impression.
I started my Lenten fast more than a week early this year. But I think I will give up smoking entirely anyways. I have no physical desire for it, and evaluating the psychological aspects does not leave me with much either. I started smoking because it was the most socially acceptable form of self punishment I had at eighteen. I continued because it was something to do, something to share and a way into conversations I didn't know how to start. I think I've grown past that now.
The only thing I do miss is having something to do with my hands. I fidget too much.
Instead of going to school, I want to lay here with my white tiger that I've finally named Dmitri. Should have gone with my first impression.
no subject
Re: