threeplusfire | (no subject)

Shaking off that dread feeling. Spent my morning crouched on the sofa, wrapped in an old sheet and the blue crystal rosary my grandmother gave me on Sunday. The sheet is a relic of my childhood, worn thin from the years. It's a pattern of zebras and antelope and elephants on the African plain, from the first bed that was truly mine. When we moved to Austin in '87, my parents got me a waterbed that I loved above all else. Squishy and soft, warm or cool, it was the best bed. I miss the smell of the plastic and the gentle sway at night when I rocked myself to sleep.

Armoring myself in the nice bra, the jeans and the shoes with traction for running away. I'm going out now.