I understand that part of the reason he didn't tell me about any of this was because he wanted to deal with it on his own, and because it was all tied into a very bad past relationship. I'm pretty much over the initial anger/upset thing now, and we had a long talk last night when I got home.

The thing is, with the way our finances are at the moment there is no real way Alan could possibly pay for these debts. I can't stomach the idea of living with these things lurking where they make it imposible for him to get a license, or to ever get power hooked up in his name. Because I'm the one with the bank account where our savings go, it's going to have to come from there. I've already told him though that his year end bonus check will go towards clearing out these debts before I apply any of my money to the problem.