goodbye dad

May. 3rd, 2001 05:46 pm
threeplusfire: (moon)
[personal profile] threeplusfire
I tried to speak to my father this afternoon. I ignored one of my most important rules: never assume anyone is rational. God. I tried to very calmly explain my position to him, but it all exploded in my face. He started yelling about how immature I am, how I can't handle the real world, etc, etc.

Well fuck you. Fuck you. You don't know a damn thing about my life for the past couple of years. I started with nothing, being thrown out of the house. I worked a full time job in the middle of the night for two years and put myself through college with good grades all by myself. You didn't give me a damn thing, financial, emotional or otherwise. You don't know anything about me Dad. I thought we had a relationship that you cared about, but it just seems I'm one more uppity female in your life. No, I will not let it just roll off me. I don't have to listen to your rage.

Fuck you. How can you say these things to me? I should be proud. I've survived more than most people ever have to deal with. I came from a coma in the ICU, barely alive, to where I am now. I am a senior, with a high GPA, about to go on a prestigious summer program at one of the oldest universities in the world. I have a car, and I pay my bills on time each month. In four years I moved so far, and no one can take that away from me. I can deal, no matter what you or anyone else thinks. I am not afraid anymore.

I'm so angry and so hurt. I never expected my father of all people in my immediate family to turn on me like this. It's obvious I can't continue speaking to him for the time being. *sigh* My family has just crumbled in the space of a few months.
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