A year ago

[threeplusfire]

DAY TWENTY-FOUR: a letter to yourself a year ago

Hey,

Quit that fucking job now. Just do it. Don't think about anyone else. Just quit.
Do not fucking sign up to be the person who does all the legal shit. Just don't. Clean that apartment out and walk. the. fuck. away. Nothing you're going to get from that process will matter because it will make you hate everything and everyone and it will suck.
Do not drink so goddamn much the night before the wake. You'll throw up in a Taco Cabana bathroom and feel so much shame. Just don't do that to yourself.
Death sucks. It sucks so much.
Fuck everything. This is NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.
Go to fucking therapy.

Seriously, quit that job now.
-Me


DAY ONE: introduce yourself / list your likes and dislikes
DAY TWO: make a bullet list of everything that happened in your day
DAY THREE: your favorite movie
DAY FOUR: a photo of you taken over ten years ago
DAY FIVE: a letter to your crush
DAY SIX: list what you ate today
DAY SEVEN: a youtube video that you find funny
DAY EIGHT: a photo of you taken recently
DAY NINE: list some of your favorite websites
DAY TEN: a letter to the person you hate the most or caused you a lot of pain
DAY ELEVEN: share your favorite recipe
DAY TWELVE: we want to see your teeth today
DAY THIRTEEN: whatever tickles your fancy
DAY FOURTEEN: a song from your childhood
DAY FIFTEEN: a letter to someone you wish you could meet
DAY SIXTEEN: provide pictures of 5 celebrity crushes
DAY SEVENTEEN: a photo that makes you sad
DAY EIGHTEEN: set or share a goal
DAY NINETEEN: whatever tickles your fancy
DAY TWENTY: a letter to someone that changed your life
DAY TWENTY-ONE: your favorite television program
DAY TWENTY-TWO: a photo that makes you happy
DAY TWENTY-THREE: share one of your current favorite tunes

DAY TWENTY-FIVE: a letter to someone you judged by their first impression
DAY TWENTY-SIX: favorite books
DAY TWENTY-SEVEN: a talent of yours
DAY TWENTY-EIGHT: favorite places to shop
DAY TWENTY-NINE: provide the hex code of your favorite color
DAY THIRTY: a letter to the friendliest person you knew for only one day
DAY THIRTY-ONE: whatever tickles your fancy
DAY THIRTY-TWO: a photo you took
DAY THIRTY-THREE: what you're craving right now
DAY THIRTY-FOUR: your favorite quote
DAY THIRTY-FIVE: a letter to an ex
DAY THIRTY-SIX: some hobbies of yours
DAY THIRTY-SEVEN: a song that you like to dance to
DAY THIRTY-EIGHT: a photo of your parent(s)
DAY THIRTY-NINE: zodiac sign and do you think it fits your personality
DAY FORTY: a letter to a deceased person you wish you could talk to
DAY FORTY-ONE: whatever tickles your fancy
DAY FORTY-TWO: bad habit(s) you have
DAY FORTY-THREE: a picture of your favorite place in the world
DAY FORTY-FOUR: something that fascinates you and why
DAY FORTY-FIVE: whatever tickles your fancy
DAY FORTY-SIX: photos of personal things in your life (pets, family, house, etc.)
DAY FORTY-SEVEN: birthday wish list
DAY FORTY-EIGHT: a photo of you right now
DAY FORTY-NINE: hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
DAY FIFTY: a letter to your reflection in the mirror

Comments

[weegoddess.livejournal.com]

::sigh::

Hindsight is 20/20. I don't know you well enough to know if you're being gentle with yourself about all this, but there's lots of stuff you couldn't have known, or at least couldn't have recognized clearly. You're doing the best you can with what you have. We all are.

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

One of the most painful things about therapy for me is acknowledging that I know what's wrong, that I have internalized a lot of terrible messages, that there are good reasons for why I'm unhappy - but that knowledge doesn't immediately translate into acceptance or well being or an ability to hurdle those obstacles.

I think if you asked my friends, they would say I'm so damn hard on myself in a way I would never treat another person. (Yet another thing to deal with in therapy!)

If anything though, this experience has proven to me that setting boundaries and walking the hell away from stuff is really good for me.