I hear songs

BELGIUM: ROYAL GREENHOUSES PUBLIC OPENING

The greenhouses at the Royal Palace in Laeken, Belgium are open to
the public for only 10 days each year. This six acres of neoclassical
rotundas, domes, and galleries are currently open for visitors until
May 6. Giant ferns, banana trees, grottoes, glades, and grassy vistas
are tended by 20 full-time gardeners. Guests can also enjoy climbing
geraniums and fuchsias, a colony of birds, orange trees, and the
Azalea House.

An introduction to Belgium:
http://www.visitbelgium.com/bxhome.htm
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The reports talk about how the heat was so intense because of the concrete firewalls. Ironically, what saved everyone else was also what made the fire hot enough to melt the alarm speaker in the hallway, and the emergency strobe lights. No sprinklers.

Going to school when someone has died is weird. I remember it from high school, especially the year C.W. Dean was beaten to death in his own driveway. I had no idea, and when I got to school that morning I saw police everywhere. Crying FFA girls, and boys trying to look fierce and protective. I suppose it's not so concentrated on a campus of 50,000 people. Though sometimes I see groups on the Main mall, gathered under one of the flag poles in mourning for a student or a professor or someone on the staff.
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Two oranges and a grapefruit. Pamplemousse I remember from high school French class. I want only to get through this day, through this week. Dreamed of scripts and being abandoned, of empty halls and hiding in office rooms.

Only spent a little bit of time outside yesterday and my skin is already changing to my summer color. I don't even try. It's odd. My father's blood, my genetic heritage from German farmers and Comanche women centuries ago. I don't mind because of that. Sometimes it is nice to have a family connection you can feel.

driving like speed

So I drove to get out the anger and the pain and the frustration. I find myself getting in the car these days and turning up the stereo because it is the only place I can be alone and scream as loud as I want. The good part is driving in Austin is always so dangerous that I don't even have to try. When I'm feeling angry I'll race little pretentious boys in Hondas ont he highway, me and my little old car. Yeah I know. My one sin is taking corners too hard, and slamming on the accelerator.

I felt my fifteen year old self, who listened to Tool and L7, because their screams were my screams, and it was so much louder on the stereo. I needed that, I needed to remember that I am still alive, that I am still me, that it is okay really somewhere.
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Hard to think that one can gain from a tragedy. But I was pleased in my heart to see the Daily Texan had scooped all the major papers on the University Towers story, and that Jeff Healey's photo ran on the front page of both the Austin and Houston papers.

I gave my government professor Nishino the highest marks and a page of comments. Something about those people who get their PhDs at Princeton... they are all so cool. I think I might want to get my PhD there too. Except that I should learn German. Eek. Well, at least my final government essay is written. I might go by his office and ask about Israel. We never touched on America's position on Israel, and I would be interested in what he has to say. How wonderful that I enjoyed one of my core classes so much.

Listening to my roommate's music is killing my writing mood. So many thoughts were racing in my head, competing with the road for my attention. But I just can't listen to Brahms and write like that. There is a place for this music and it is not here. Going to go back to my room and listen to my Long Roads mix cd. Everything will be alright.