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Oct. 3rd, 2001 07:29 amNot having a computer is driving me insane. I need a functional computer. Right now. I am sick of going to labs or borrowing Melynda's.
I suppose I should try to remember the things that make me happy instead of brooding.. I don't know. Is it all chemical?
Sparrows. Little groups of sparrows hopping on the ground.
When I'm in the car, I think about driving. About just driving on without stopping until I am far, far away. This is not a new thought. It's been there since I started driving in 97. The desire to go somewhere else and start completely over.
I think what drives me crazy is that this is my only life. I will never be anyone else. I will never grow up another way or live out something completely different. As a kid you're told you can be anything, the possibilities are endless. Now it's all so finite. I feel trapped, in my head, in my body.
So damn tired.
I suppose I should try to remember the things that make me happy instead of brooding.. I don't know. Is it all chemical?
Sparrows. Little groups of sparrows hopping on the ground.
When I'm in the car, I think about driving. About just driving on without stopping until I am far, far away. This is not a new thought. It's been there since I started driving in 97. The desire to go somewhere else and start completely over.
I think what drives me crazy is that this is my only life. I will never be anyone else. I will never grow up another way or live out something completely different. As a kid you're told you can be anything, the possibilities are endless. Now it's all so finite. I feel trapped, in my head, in my body.
So damn tired.