burning slowly

If I just lay here
would you lie with me
and just forget about the world

Some nights I can't sleep. Some nights, it's all I can do to keep my eyes open. I've been listening to Snow Patrol over and over like some emo kid gone wild, but I think it is the end of the year melancholy just getting to me. It's okay though, because it's cleaner and clearer than it has ever been. Time is such an equalizer.

Some nights, I'm happy for no reason. Just because I can be.

Someone with a camera needs to take my damn picture and make me a new icon. Or, I could get a camera but we know that isn't happening.

one week more

I've been looking at my picture of my grandfather from 1984, and it has finally occured to me that's where I got my nose. Hmm. How odd. I do resemble my mother more, but I have my father's coloring instead. I've also noticed that in the very young pictures of my grandfather, he looks an awful lot like my cousin Rob. (Yes, part of that is the glasses and the short hair, but they have the same shape of face.) Anyhow, I am hoping he will send me more scans of the photographs he has.

This morning is cloudy, and I'm in no mood for business. It's almost Christmas though, and that makes me happy. I suppose I should get dressed for work, armor myself for the day. Maybe we'll get very lucky and it will be quiet. Most of the schools are letting out about now, and call volume drops some then.

Is it too early to plan for my birthday? I want to do something special this coming year. (Yeah, yeah, five months away already.) I'm taking off time the week before to go to Phoenix Rising with Racheline, but I think I need to take a long weekend for my birthday too. Maybe even go somewhere. The thought just occured to me when I woke up this morning.

Somewhere in this apartment lurks my magazine that I am not done reading.

this city's killing me

Found the magazine, and I was checking on the status of Child's Play this morning. ZOMG, $760,000. Awesome. That makes me glad. The photos of the dinner/auction are hilarious.

So the plastic laptop tray thing I've been using? Well, the stress cracks are finally turning into actual breakage. I think after Christmas I'm going to have to buy an actual laptop desk type object. This laptop is just heavy. One day soon I need to pull all my mp3s and such off my old laptop as well.

The coffee is starting to kick in, and I think I'll make it.

ninety minutes gone by

That's ninety minutes of my life not coming back. Sometimes I get a little depressed and scared by all those hours I spend at work. I just stuck it out through an hour long call with a very difficult caller. It required a lot of explanations and finesse and took forever. Argh. I want a nap now.

Sometimes I get really, really tired of being nice to people. It is wearisome. Another extra long call and difficult caller who just couldn't stop talking to answer a damn question. I know all these people are in hard spots, but I hate bearing the brunt of their emotional turmoil some days.

Don't mind me, I think it is just the weather today. I'm sort of peeved by some family situations, worried about some people and just overall frustrated with the pace of the day.