the afternoon light

the afternoon light, originally uploaded by Anton the Tsar.

A month ago, I sat on James' headstone. Barefoot and chain smoking, I thought about how much I regret in this life and how James was a brother to me when I needed one.Today a jury took less than thirty minutes to decide the man who smashed into him at over 90mph was guilty of murder. I wish I could say this makes it feel better, that it hurts any less. But the truth is that it doesn't. Even if this man dies in prison, spends the rest of his life there, even then I don't think I'll feel any better. This will always hurt, because of the unfair nature of the universe. James was a profoundly decent, loving man who was good to the people around him. Nothing can make up for the loss of such a life.