will I ever learn to sleep

[threeplusfire]

Even after it quieted down, sleep proved elusive. I think it is my lungs. Finally I piled my pillows up and drifted off almost sitting up.Too much dreaming of death.

I started my Lenten fast more than a week early this year. But I think I will give up smoking entirely anyways. I have no physical desire for it, and evaluating the psychological aspects does not leave me with much either. I started smoking because it was the most socially acceptable form of self punishment I had at eighteen. I continued because it was something to do, something to share and a way into conversations I didn't know how to start. I think I've grown past that now.

The only thing I do miss is having something to do with my hands. I fidget too much.

Instead of going to school, I want to lay here with my white tiger that I've finally named Dmitri. Should have gone with my first impression.

Comments

[xiuzan.livejournal.com]

I just finished reading an article about fidgeting, like 2 minutes ago. You should check it out. Apparently fidgeting can be good :). Although, I'm glad to hear you're giving up smoking. Yay! You'll just have to find something healthy to fidget with.

http://abcnews.go.com/sections/GMA/AmericanFamily/GMA020208_NastyHabits.html

Re:

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

Fidgeting is fun. :D