just as long as I remember who's wearing the trousers

[threeplusfire]

I'm taking a ride with my best friend

Driving home, and just as I turned onto the freeway, Depeche Mode comes on, and there I am with the window rolled down so that my hands are freezing. I'm the only car for a mile or so, gliding to the sounds and the light is so bright. I can feel, inside my black clothes and boots, under my winter coat and hat, the diamond kernel of myself. It's such a strange thing to know, despite the madness and fumbling, buried in a thousand and one gestures and layers and choices, that I am there underneath it all and I just have to work on pulling that part of myself further out until it is all that I am.

There was another song, name forgotten, but tune and words recognized that took me home, through lights, over the lines and around the curve.

it leads you on
despite your desperation
under the milky way tonight

Comments

[maldeluxx.livejournal.com]

The Church: "Under the Milky Way" Ooh, I love it. :)

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[tsarina.livejournal.com]

Ahh, thank you muchly.

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[maldeluxx.livejournal.com]

*bows* ;) I've been on a Church kick recently.

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[tsarina.livejournal.com]

I've heard that song so many times, all these years, and never known the name. The radio never tells you when you need to know.

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[maldeluxx.livejournal.com]

OMG!! Really? *grin* I first bumped into them in 1992 or so. This one is on the "Starfish" CD, the first for most Church fans I know. I think I bought "Heyday" first though.
Heh. Church is in my interests now, there's only one other who has listed The Church (The Band) so I don't know how many LJ Church fans there are.

[delchi.livejournal.com]

One of my favorite driving in the cold with the windows down songs. LAst time I heard that in NYC It was in a friends T top car, with the top down, the windows down, cruising the FDR and remembering things probably best forgotten.

It seems like the introspection beast is rearing it's head in everyones life.

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[tsarina.livejournal.com]

It's funny how driving does that to you. I suppose that, and the cold, raise your awareness of seperation and self. Driving seems to make me feel disconnected from everything.

[doctorno.livejournal.com]

Driving seems to make me feel disconnected from everything.

It's very interesting that you say that; I'm surmising that you spent most of your life in very urban environments (cities that are taller than they are wide).

Or maybe not. I say that because I come from an area of wide open spaces, and driving always had made me feel very connected. I love to drive, and have driven about 25k per year since I have been able. Once, when I had a serious job interview one afternoon, I took myself to Red Rock Canyon and drove the one way scenic loop as fast as I could safely do so. It was exhilarating and relaxing at the same time. One day in September, we arose early on a Sunday morning, dropped the top on the Fiat, and drove 500 miles through northern Nevada and Utah, returning home about 7pm that night, just 'cause.

It's true: many (if not most) cars out there are designed with isolation as their primary "comfort" characteristic. Both mid-range sedans and those pricey behemoth rollling living rooms we call SUVs pride themselves in creating a zone of isolation. I am the kind of driver who prefers to feel the road and experience the essence of driving. We once drove from Las Vegas to Telluride, Colorado, 650 miles each way, and never had the top up once. We also drove across the country in a "shumnpiking" adventure (shunpiking is when you drive 2-lane state highways, avoiding the intyerstaes as much as your route makes possible. We saw 28 states in 21 days, and by shunpiking, we saw an America very different that the restostop America most people see when driving. And we did that trip in a little truck, so although having the proper equipment (a sports or 'sporty' car is essential; a German 5-door like a Golf, as long as it has a sunroof and windows that roll down, will work fine).

In short, I understand why driving tends to have an isolating effect on people, but there are choices that can lead you down another path. If you have to drive, may as well enjoy it! :-)

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[tsarina.livejournal.com]

I was born in the Texas Panhandle, and I've lived for the past fourteen years in the far end of what is now the Austin suburbs. Didn't used to be Austin really, when we first moved here. But Hwy 183 gets bigger every year, and the city limit line creeps outward.

I get that disconnected feeling when I'm driving my mother's Explorer, or sometimes alone in other people's cars. I imagine it has something to do with not having a car of my own anymore.

But I know what you mean, about just driving sometimes just because it is beautiful, and just 'cause. I used to drive up and down the 360 Loop for that, because it weaves up and down, over the river and there is a hidden, beautiful view of the city proper through a gap in the hills.

Sometime, I should have a proper roadtrip. I have to work on my queasiness when other people drive though. ;)