"Peace be with you."
Apr. 15th, 2001 09:46 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
threeplusfirePatrick wrote something interesting in his journal about the gathering of people. It seemed to go alongside what I was thinking about this morning. That I'm always so afraid somehow of people. I am afraid of connections, because so often those connections have wounded me. I'm still afraid everytime I walk into the church. But the moment comes when we rise to say the Our Father, and we all join hands. Tentatively, I take the hands of the people beside. Often I'm on the end of a pew, so I have to step into the aisle to join two rows of people. I worry that my hands will shake, and always it seems one person's hand is cold and the other's is warm. I think about my own hands. It is a beautiful moment, to hear the church pray together. I watch the crucifix above the altar, half expecting Christ to step down and join hands with us. The prayer ends and we step back to our places in the pews, and I am still half nervous. Then Father offers us the sign of peace, and we turn to each other to shake hands or hug. In this moment, my world changes. The people I turn to are so welcoming, so genuine in their handshakes and smiles. So many times I've been hugged unexpectedly, or tapped on the shoulder by someone who recognized me and wanted to say "Peace be with you." In this moment I lose my fear, and I feel at home in the church in a way I've never felt before.
That is one of the things I love about the Mass. No matter where I go, from cathedrals to renovated office space, to little rooms to country churches, that moment is always waiting for me.
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In a cathedral in Paris, five years ago next month, I stood awestruck on the stone floor. For the first time in my life I attempted to pray while I sat in a pew. I was sixteen, on my first trip away from my family and America. I remember looking at my friend Kyle, who had been in my French class since seventh grade. I said something like, "You know, if I was ever going to be religious I would have to be Catholic because they have the most amazing buildings I've ever seen."
That is one of the things I love about the Mass. No matter where I go, from cathedrals to renovated office space, to little rooms to country churches, that moment is always waiting for me.
________________________________________
In a cathedral in Paris, five years ago next month, I stood awestruck on the stone floor. For the first time in my life I attempted to pray while I sat in a pew. I was sixteen, on my first trip away from my family and America. I remember looking at my friend Kyle, who had been in my French class since seventh grade. I said something like, "You know, if I was ever going to be religious I would have to be Catholic because they have the most amazing buildings I've ever seen."
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Date: 2001-04-15 07:35 pm (UTC)heh
Date: 2001-04-15 08:58 pm (UTC)I know what you mean by that. There is a church in New York -- I think it's in Farmingville, on Long Island, that is most like this -- which just screams sixties liberal reform...
I mean, I'm not exclusively traditional, and I like small and informal. I guess I just really don't like big and informal? ;)
Re: heh
Date: 2001-04-15 09:14 pm (UTC)yes, i suppose i do have the blues. my family church is more "cathedral" than "small church" and so i guess that's where my tastes lie. however, i did always like the woodsy churches i went to in houston and austin. in dallas we went to "christ the king" which was VERY oldschool. they even had kneelers for communion which the "family" church in illinois was forced to remove.