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November 3rd, A Softer World - Look at this

I watched Kerry's speech in the break room at the office this afternoon. A coworker I do not know laughed and laughed at Edwards, while tears streamed down my face. I didn't think I was going to cry, but I'm far more rattled by the election than I imagined I would feel. I am in so much physical pain as well, which makes even sitting in my office chair agonizing. Damn my wasted fertility.

I cried, because I had let myself believe we had a chance of changing things and because I believed that people would not vote on their fears and hates. I cried because I had let myself believe.

I cried because there are eleven states where the majority of the population thinks some of us are less than human and less deserving. I'm so appalled and angry and sick by that development that I can't even come up with a coherent statement on the subject.

The lack of turnout amongst the 18-24 demographic has also filled me with rage and disgust. You didn't fear Puff Daddy, but you should fear me. Fair warning: if I find out you were able to vote and you didn't, I will personally bitch slap you. Damn it.

I have the cold comfort that so many people did go out and vote. It annoys me that Bush claims a historic and decisive victory when it was anything but decisive. It was so damned close. It was a little over a hundred thousand votes in fucking Ohio of all places that made it so. The overall race was so close that it can't truly be called decisive.

Frankly, it scares the hell out of me that Bush won the popular vote. It sends a message to the world that we are afraid, and that more than half our country wants to stay with a leader who brought us into debt and war. What must the world think of us now? It makes me so sad. It makes me so goddamned sad. I'm scared for all of us.

In a few days I'll be calmer. I won't be ready to just start weeping. I'll be able to read the news again. In a few days, I'll be ready to deal with what comes next and to figure out what I can do. Just give me a few days.

Date: 2004-11-03 04:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alainn-sorcha.livejournal.com
What the hell does that mean?!? I can't even decide if they're being serious or not.

Date: 2004-11-03 04:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tsarina.livejournal.com
They make strange satirical comics. They're Canadian.

Date: 2004-11-03 05:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alainn-sorcha.livejournal.com
I love them. I didn't know they were Canadian, though. That makes me feel much much better.

Date: 2004-11-03 06:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] in-thy-bounty.livejournal.com
The rest of the world is just shaking its head in silence.

Date: 2004-11-03 07:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tsarina.livejournal.com
I am very grateful that in the time I've spent overseas no one has ever given me hell for being an American. I worry that will change.

Date: 2004-11-06 09:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] in-thy-bounty.livejournal.com
I've yet to find an American living abroad who supports the Bush administration, probably because these are the people who can see beyond the boundaries of their own state. For the next four years, anti-American feeling will undoubtedly be rising worldwide. I wonder where it will all end.

Date: 2004-11-03 06:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] roadnotes.livejournal.com
I'm almost tempted to remove everyone from my friends list for a few days, and then read things starting from, say, Monday. We'll see. I am sick to my stomach, in many ways, but I'm not completely despairing any more.

I still need more time to catch my breath, though.

Date: 2004-11-03 07:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tsarina.livejournal.com
Yeah, I debated for two hours before I started reading the friends list today. It was harsh.

Date: 2004-11-03 07:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nimlowyn.livejournal.com
I am dumbfounded. Completely. Dumbfounded.

What does this say about us, truly?

I take what little comfort I can from history -- enlightenment is never easily won.

Date: 2004-11-03 07:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tsarina.livejournal.com
Me too. It just boggles my mind.

Someone on my list today mentioned that the true spirit of the people who fought for civil rights was that they never gave up no matter what they endured. It's the most comforting thing I've read today.

Date: 2004-11-05 11:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] baseproduct.livejournal.com
I cried, because I had let myself believe we had a chance of changing things and because I believed that people would not vote on their fears and hates. I cried because I had let myself believe.

I nearly cried myself, and I'm not usually one to show my emotions. I'm even more impressed with Edwards' composure knowing that his wife had breast cancer. Seeing his strength in what had to be the hardest time of his life so far has given me the force of will to pull myself together and realize that I've got to keep trying to make a difference, no matter how hard it will be. I'll probably fail, but at least I'll have stood on my convictions.

Other than the two Johns' speech, the only thing to give me any comfort the last few days has been Lou Reed. "You're going to reap just what you sow..."

Date: 2004-11-05 12:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tsarina.livejournal.com
This is true. This is very true. And something I needed to hear right now.

You know, I showed Waldo at work that comic the other morning. She printed it out to take to her church, because she believes it. It took a lot of composure to keep from slapping her.

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