tense much?
Jan. 31st, 2004 10:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
threeplusfireI have a mild fear of crowds that can fluctuate wildly. Knowing this, the decision to go to the grocery store the night before the Super Bowl was a very bad one.
It was horribly crowded and I had a cart to hold all the vegetables and cake things. I chose the least crowded aisle to go up. At the end, a girl was blocking the path with her cart, waiting in line. There was room for me to pass if she would shift a few inches one way or the other. I made eye contact and politely said "Excuse me, I need to get by."
She looked directly at me, and then walked away. Walked away like she hadn't noticed me at all, to look at magazines. I completely lost my temper and called her a bitch, then moved her cart myself. The entire time all she did was glance at me with an utterly blank expression.
I will not take that from people I know, much less strangers. Perhaps I was out of line in bellowing an obscenity at her, but it punched an awful button in me. I felt sick to my stomach the entire time I was in HEB.
Hiding at home now to recover my balance. I hate losing control in such a fashion. Ever since my car was broken into, I've felt a lot more unnecessary unease and tension. Every time I walk out to my car, I worry I'll see another broken window. I worry about getting mugged, despite my only experience with that being overseas. It's irritating, and I need to work through it soon.
Edited to add:
I'm not the only one. Alan ran to Walmart to pick up a bundt pan for me and stuff for tomatillo salsa. Inside there were only 5 registers open, and dozens of people in line for each one. A manager walked by, and Alan lit into him. He asked the manager why he couldn't open a register. The manager replied in a shocked tone that he was busy managing thing. Alan's reply? "Well you're doing a shit job of that, aren't you?" Other customers were getting involved, and sensing a riot, the little manager ran off to open more registers. Hah! Cate, he picked a fight with a manager in Walmart! We are officially Texas white trash now! Hahaha.
It was horribly crowded and I had a cart to hold all the vegetables and cake things. I chose the least crowded aisle to go up. At the end, a girl was blocking the path with her cart, waiting in line. There was room for me to pass if she would shift a few inches one way or the other. I made eye contact and politely said "Excuse me, I need to get by."
She looked directly at me, and then walked away. Walked away like she hadn't noticed me at all, to look at magazines. I completely lost my temper and called her a bitch, then moved her cart myself. The entire time all she did was glance at me with an utterly blank expression.
I will not take that from people I know, much less strangers. Perhaps I was out of line in bellowing an obscenity at her, but it punched an awful button in me. I felt sick to my stomach the entire time I was in HEB.
Hiding at home now to recover my balance. I hate losing control in such a fashion. Ever since my car was broken into, I've felt a lot more unnecessary unease and tension. Every time I walk out to my car, I worry I'll see another broken window. I worry about getting mugged, despite my only experience with that being overseas. It's irritating, and I need to work through it soon.
Edited to add:
I'm not the only one. Alan ran to Walmart to pick up a bundt pan for me and stuff for tomatillo salsa. Inside there were only 5 registers open, and dozens of people in line for each one. A manager walked by, and Alan lit into him. He asked the manager why he couldn't open a register. The manager replied in a shocked tone that he was busy managing thing. Alan's reply? "Well you're doing a shit job of that, aren't you?" Other customers were getting involved, and sensing a riot, the little manager ran off to open more registers. Hah! Cate, he picked a fight with a manager in Walmart! We are officially Texas white trash now! Hahaha.
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no subject
Date: 2004-01-31 07:29 pm (UTC)Knowing is half the step, I just need the other piece now. So much frustration. Sometimes I hate psychology.
Heeb! Hahaha. I love that. Yeah, I imagine your reaction would have been about like mine.
no subject
Date: 2004-01-31 07:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-31 07:37 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2004-01-31 07:43 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2004-01-31 09:26 pm (UTC)those things are fun
that way you can put it on whatever kind of shirt you want