this is real

[threeplusfire]

I had my first suicidal caller today, about two hours ago. It was an older woman who just wanted to die. She felt her life was hopeless, and that all the people who loved her were gone. Her daughter died, and her son was murdered, and she had nowhere to go.

My hands shook so badly when she first wailed it out. I spent nearly an hour on the line, until law enforcement arrived. Someone sat with me, and I had supervisors running around trying to track down the address and get the police out immediately.

It was terrifying.

I should be glad that I was able to talk to her. I should be glad that I got things rolling so she can help. But I still feel sick to my stomach. I had the life of a stranger in my hands for that hour, it felt like and I was so afraid that she would hang up.

Comments

Good job, girl!

[snaxxx.livejournal.com]

I know that must have been tough. I mentioned your episode to a co-worker who has helped develop "critical incident stress" protocols- she worked on the Luby's Massacre cleanup. She stated that if you can keep them on at least ten minutes, chances are pretty good. Glad to hear your supervisors had everything under control, but hope you've been debriefed as well.

*hugs*

luv ya gal, I'm here if you need anything!