endless iterations

The San Francisco Plaza Hotel is a great hotel for a great price. While it isn't as close to main attractions, it is in decent walking distance. I could get to the main plazas in minutes. The room worked out fine. The bed was clean and the bathroom had hot water.

The hotel staff we friendly and very helpful with any questions that we had. One thing to note, the hotel appeared to be in a small gay district. The clubs closest to the hotel seemed to be either gay or lesbian spots; however, this did not limit the experience.

Three guesses. Come on.

Well, at least it is Friday.

Ladies and Gentleman, I present to you - The Worst Sportcoat in the World. Worse even than the horrible fake fur rosettes on home shopping networks, the faux leather in metallic pastels or the beaded fringed suede. For only $495, you can own a jacket designed to make people wonder if the social workers let you do crafts in your spare time.

The Dundee Panel Tartan Sport Coat

Sometimes I think my job should come with warnings. Warning, you will never be able to unsee these hideous consumer goods.

Dear concert going public,

While summer is winding down, there are still plenty of major touring acts hitting the roads all around the country. Concerts are lots of fun, so here are some tips for making the most of them:

- Concerts can be great family experiences. However, don't take your elementary school age children into a mosh pit at a punk/metal/rock show and expect everyone around you to stop slam dancing to protect your little precious snowflake.

- Don't go see Joan Baez if you don't like her political opinions. Don't get angry when Joan Baez has a political opinion.

- You really don't need 900 self portraits taken with your cell phone during the show, and your flash is probably going to cause the guy behind you to have a rage seizure in which he pours his beer over your head and beats you.

- It's Pat Benatar, not Pat Bananatar.

- Please don''t be surprised when the guys from Green Day say "fuck" often. Have you ever actually listened to Green Day?

- Complaining about how many times Lady Gaga changes clothes is like complaining that there are people drinking excessively at a Jimmy Buffet show. It just shows everyone else you are not very bright.

Don't forget your ear plugs and enjoy your concerts!

Insincerely,
your concerned review reader

Dear Brew Pub manager,

Sending out a round of shots is not going to make a table overlook the fact that their hamburgers came on moldy buns. Sending out ten rounds of shots might do it though.

Sincerely,
Your Favorite Unsolicited Advice Person