scary advertising and talk of vaginas

[threeplusfire]

The Chronicle has an ad just across from the table of contents this week from The Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute of San Antonio. Um, whiskey tango foxtrot? The mere idea of a laser anywhere near my vagina gives me hives. The ad text reads, arranged over a nude female form and a row of smiling female faces:

New Comestic Procedures
Ladies! Experience how good life can be!
Our Board certified OB GYN, Troy Robbins Hailporn M.D., can completely resculpt and rejuvenate the vagina with a 1-hour laser procedure. These new GYN procedures help: tighten the vagina after childbirth, improve stress urinary incontinence, enhance sexual gratification. She also performs: labia reduction for large/uneven labia minora, reconstruction of the hymen

www.cosmeticgyn.net

Wha?!?!?!? The whole thing sounds hideous and very, very, very painful. The site has some graphic little diagrams, so you probably shouldn't peruse it at work. I am so very disturbed. Why the hell would you want your hymen back, unless you're playing sme shell game where you sell yourself for a lot of money as a prize virgin whore? Who the hell cares about the labia being symmetrical?

The grotesque desire for extreme plastic surgery to achieve some artificial and unnatural standard of beauty suddenly seems a whole lot more ugly now. The first person who tries to put a laser or a scalpel anywhere near my damned labia is getting a bullet in the eye.

Comments

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

I don't know, but I want to write Fox and act if they performed vagianl rejuvenations on all the contestants for the Swan.